And this is why I take public transit everywhere
On the way home from Surrey tonight (DON’T EVEN SAY A WORD), a girl sitting across from me on the Skytrain started a conversation with me. It began with a comment about a fighting couple that had just gotten off and ended with the story of how she had just broken up with her boyfriend of twelve years.
They have two kids together. She always paid for things like groceries and utilities. He always paid for things like the TV and the barbecue. Guess who got what.
Breakups are always so messy. The Dividing Of The Stuff makes it all that much harder.
But damn, 12 years? And two kids?
It kind of made me realize, shit, the things we go through for happiness.
For the things you wanted to say
As seen on the back of a stall door in the ladies washroom at a rest stop off the I-5 North:
I love reading the things people write on the walls in the stalls of bathrooms.
At first glance, most bathroom graffiti typically looks like trash—you know, the usual suspects of “JESSICA WUZ HERE” and “JT+BS FOR EVA”—and if you take it for face value, it’s nothing more than that. But if you really think about it, everything written on those walls has a story behind them. People do everything for a reason, even if they don’t consciously know the reason for it at the time.
Whenever I read the things people write on walls, I simply can’t help but wonder about the author’s life: Are JT and BS still together? What’s Jessica doing now? … And when you read particularly chilling words like “I can’t take this anymore”… Are you still hanging in there?
It’s such an odd thought, looking over a cluttered wall and knowing that many, many people have been exactly where you are, and of all those people, some of them felt particularly impressed to write something on the walls surrounding them. They’re each strangers to the next, all going through different things in life, some coming in, some going out… But the one thing these strangers all have in common is the wall. They wrote on the wall.
We’re not all that far apart from each other as may we think.
What’s the most memorable thing you’ve ever seen on a bathroom wall?
Creative frustration
Have you ever wanted to do something, attempted to do that thing and then found that no matter how hard you tried, you simply couldn’t?
That’s how I feel right now about anything that requires creative energy. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve sat down with a witty idea or two, only to find that those ideas dancing around in my head simply couldn’t find their way out my fingers. Everything feels forced, and definitely not inspired.
For me, the worst thing about creative frustration is (surprise, surprise!) the “frustration” part. Unlike other negative emotions, I have yet to find a way to channel frustration into something positive. When creative frustration hits me, it crashes the whole operating system of my right brain, sort of like what happens when you try working in Photoshop and Illustrator at the same time while you browse Firefox with 50+ tabs open—I can’t write, I can’t draw, I can’t take photos, and I sure in hell can’t design.
And he always had some mighty fine wine, singin’…
Joyyyyy to the world!
Allllll the boys and girls!
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue seaaaaa!
Joy to you and meeeee!
You’re on your way home from a fabulous evening. It’s late at night, the rain is coming down, and you’re walking down a deserted street with the one person you have the most fun with.
What are you singing?
Like crack, only better
There are people who run, and people who don’t.
Many of the people who don’t run find it relatively difficult to understand why the people who run, run. For those who don’t run, the idea of willingly submitting one’s self to such perceived torture is unfathomable. Why do it? Why make the effort? Why running?
I remember a conversation I had with the leader of my running group about a year ago. We were talking about running, and the motivations we each had for it. As a seasoned walker just dipping my feet in the world of running, she said something that somehow surprised me a great deal: “I don’t like running, actually” she said, “but it’s the feeling you get from it that I’m addicted to.”
I didn’t understand what she meant at first. And maybe, as a person who doesn’t run, you don’t either. While I can’t explain the feeling, I can tell you one thing: There is simply nothing like the rush you get after a good run. It doesn’t matter if your dog just died, your boyfriend just broke up with you or if a car just sped by and sprayed dirty slush over every inch of your being—regardless of your circumstances, you will still feel ridiculously, unexplainably giddy after.
And for the days when it’s grey and stormy outside, and you can come up with a hundred and one reasons not to hit the pavement, you’ll think back to the moment when you first felt the rush; the feeling of pure, unadulterated happiness, and you’ll go outside. You’ll brave the wind, the snow, the rain, or the heat—you’ll brave it all—because when you’ve played on the beach, you don’t ever want to go back to the sandbox.
Why do I run?
Because it’s like crack, only better.
What will you do?
Remember that goal I set in the beginning of November? I did it! As of November 30th, I’m officially a 5K; I made promotion - and as a very lovely by-product, increased my monthly income by at least 10-15%. It took a lot of hard work, sacrifice and overtime, but it paid off in the end.
And around 12am MST, just after the office closed, it finally hit me: This is actually happening. I actually own a business network. I can take a month off (which, ironically, is what I’ll be doing for most of December), and money will still come in. It actually works. And this is just the beginning.
You know, as crazy as this may sound, I can’t imagine not reaching my goals; like, the idea simply does. not. exist. In fact, I actually sat down one time and tried to imagine myself going to a “normal” school, going to college like “normal” kids, getting a “normal” 9-5 job, and working for the greater part of my life like a “normal” adult, but try as I might, I simply couldn’t see it.
And right then, I knew it: If I couldn’t see it, It. would. not. happen.
In another lifetime
It was early. Perhaps not “early” for most, but early for me. The air was crisp, cold, and the town was quiet. Undeniably quiet. Eerily quiet. Peacefully quiet. I can look outside my window and see Quadra Island, a place I’ve spend several summers at years ago. Sometimes, if I’m lucky, I can catch sight of the cute little BC Ferry that services the two islands.
For the last couple days I’ve been in Campbell River, a small town off the coast of Vancouver Island. Coming from a city of one million plus, a city of 30,000 is small. Undeniably small. Eerily small. Peacefully small. It’s like an acquired taste, almost. There is something relaxing about it; and yet, I miss home. I miss the noise, the crowds, the traffic, the good, and the bad. Most of all, I miss my bed. And my silky sheets. And speaking French to my dog.
As I walked the streets from my hotel to my work location, I couldn’t help but wonder: What would I have been like if I’d grown up in a small city like Campbell River? Would I have “turned out” differently? Would I have had the same ambitions? What kind of friends would I have had? How would I have been like? What kinds of things would I have enjoyed doing?
It’s such an odd thought, trying to imagine yourself as someone completely different. Every little bit of everything we’ve done, experienced, learned, been taught, been exposed to… all of that makes us who we are today. Change anything, and you wouldn’t be the exactly the same person.
Have you ever thought about this? Say you grew up somewhere completely opposite to where you did: how do you think you’d be different? (Or would you?)
JK Rowling: What lies ahead?
With Harry Potter completed and tucked out of the away, I can’t help but wonder: what comes now? Will any book (or series of books) manage to break JK Rowling’s impressive standings in terms of worldwide sales and phenomenon? Will any author be able to create an alternative universe as “magical” and captivating as Harry Potter?
Also, if Rowling ever decided to write another book or series, could she “out do” Harry Potter?
Sometimes
I’ve come to realize that in order to really succeed in life, you need to step out of your comfort zone.
It’s not always easy - in fact, nine out of ten times it’s downright hard. Sometimes it means talking in front of a crowd. Sometimes it means handing your brochure to the person sitting next to you on the plane, someone you’re so sure won’t be interested. Sometimes it means raising your hand and asking tough questions nobody else has the guts to voice. Sometimes it means stepping up to the plate and calling the shots, silently praying to God you’ve made the right choice. Sometimes it means taking the road less traveled, even if the path is darker and obscured by the fog.
Sometimes you just have to do it, and sometimes you’ll be pleasantly surprised. Sometimes it’s not so bad. Sometimes it is. But sometimes, you just need to feel the fear and do it anyways.
A question of intentions, integrity, and the means to an end
Is it just me, or have material donation incentives given out by representing charities and non-profit organizations become far more common in the last 10 years?
You know you’ve seen it, probably even donated money for it… A dollar for a blue silicon bracelet with an inspirational “stop prostate cancer” saying… A cute pink pen for donating a minimum of two dollars to stop breast cancer… A heart-shaped pin with a child’s drawing engraved in it for donating to children’s charities… Baring your boobies (or donating money to see said pictures) to raise money for breast cancer research…
All those organizations could have saved the money spent on producing such promotional “thank you for donating” material and put it towards their cause. Why is it that these organizations think we need to get stuff in return to “do the right thing”? I’d be perfectly happy donating to a good cause without getting anything in return. At the very least, they could send a mass heartfelt thank you email out to all donators. Why go to such lengths?
Have we become so material-orientated that we are less inclined to donate to a cause or organization if they have nothing to “offer” us? And if not, then why do these organizations seem to have this impression? Don’t tell me it’s a way of saying “thank you” to its donators - I don’t believe that for a second. It might be partially true, but I highly doubt that is the total and complete reason.
I understand that most people are naturally drawn to “stuff”, and as a result will probably be more motivated to donate if they are given something in return, but personally I think the money spent on little “thank you” materials could be better used somewhere else, even if it turns out to be a small and relatively insignificant amount. There are other less expensive ways of promoting and advocating the donation of money to worthy causes.
To be honest, if anything, organizations that offer such materials make me suspicious and doubtful of their claims. How do I really know my money donated isn’t going towards something other than the cause itself? In many cases, they often do not tell you that a portion of the proceed goes towards the actual cause. A portion? A portion of a dollar?
Yeah, that’s sure going to change the world.
I hate being so pessimistic and negative, but in this day and age, believing everything you are told and taking everything for face value makes you a fool. Does it help you sleep better at night knowing you’ve done your part to help discover a cure for breast cancer by giving them a dollar and getting a silly bracelet in return? (And don’t even get me started on the direction “a cure for cancer” is heading, or how corrupted the BCCA is in terms of pushing drugs and unnatural means, downplaying natural remedies as possible means to a cure!)
I think the old-fashioned way was the best. If you want to make a difference in this world and actually do something, forget going through glitzy promotional 3rd party organizations. Want to help starving people in 3rd world countries? Get out there and do it yourself, or really do your research and help fund a genuine, committed person or organization of persons to do it.
I believe Margaret Mead, an anthropologist, scientist and intellectual said it best when she said “Never doubt that a small group of committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.”
Out of curiosity, I have to wonder: Would you donate money to a cause or organization if you got nothing back in return? Do materialistic incentives such as pens, bracelets, etc. actually motivate you to give back, or would less tangible things such as a report about how your money is being used be sufficient?
