The best kind of April Fool’s joke
This just came in the mail today:
Check out the issue date.
More comic relief from my brother
Talking about a piece of gum that dropped on the floor:
“I’m going to go wash this.”
“Don’t wash it! It will only turn sticky.”
“I washed a cookie I dropped on the floor once…”
“Denzil, washing doesn’t help everything.”
“I know… that’s why I don’t take baths anymore.”
Looking good, March!
The month isn’t even over yet, but it’s already quite apparent that March has been the month of doing things I thought I could never do. First it was the 5K run in 36 minutes and 49 seconds. Next it was the dance competition (and bringing home my first ever trophies!) I told everyone I couldn’t “wouldn’t” do. And today? Today I ran twenty minutes. Straight. WITHOUT STOPPING OR WANTING TO DIE.
You probably won’t understand the significance of this, and that’s okay. But I do. I remember the girl who couldn’t make it halfway around the track without dying - but tonight I was the girl who ran a total of 68 minutes, running 10, 15, 20, and 10 minutes straight with 1 minute breaks in between. I did it.
If I keep this up, I could actually achieve world domination before I turn twenty-five.
Now, if only I could take my driver’s test…
Someone you never talk to is now in a relationship with someone you’ve never heard of
Abstract thought of the hour: Facebook is incredibly creepy and stalker-like when it comes to publishing information about your friends’ every online (and in some cases, offline) move.
And while we’re on that topic: Has anyone ever noticed that Facebook’s feeds are a new breed of passive gossip? I’m reminded of one of the first things anyone ever told me about Facebook mere hours after I joined:
When a couple breaks up, Facebook knows about it before they do.
What is the strangest thing you’ve ever learned (intentionally or not) about any of your friends through a social networking site like Facebook?
It’s moments like these that make me proud to have him as a brother
9:30 pm, over instant noodles I just cooked for the two of us:
Me: “Denzil… Do you ever wish your butt was bigger?”
My brother: “Do you ever wish your butt was *smaller*?”
Sunshine: Now back in style!
From the front page of The Vancouver Sun’s Weekend Review:
Sunshine is making a comeback.
I know precisely when it went out of style, too—In fact, I believe it was somewhere between “snow”, “sunsets at 4pm” and “hell”. No joke. I’m more than ready for summer.
And he always had some mighty fine wine, singin’…
Joyyyyy to the world!
Allllll the boys and girls!
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue seaaaaa!
Joy to you and meeeee!
You’re on your way home from a fabulous evening. It’s late at night, the rain is coming down, and you’re walking down a deserted street with the one person you have the most fun with.
What are you singing?
Two things: An experience in geekery
I did two things today, two things I never expected to do anytime in the near future:
- Removed and installed RAM.
- Did a “live chat” with an online HP technician.
The RAM part was a bit tricky. There were bundles and bundles of wires in the way, preventing me from accessing the card - it took about 10 minutes to find it, and another 40 to replace it. I think I’m starting to get an idea why computer repair guys charge insane amounts of money to do seemingly nothing.
The live chat was interesting. “Patmon S.” was clinically polite and helpful, albeit a little too robot-like. I initiated the chat half expecting nothing to happen, like, wow? someone actually does this? It’s the little white guy who lives in my computer! He speaks! OH MY GOD, HE (she?) WILL HELP ME SAVE MY COMPUTER FROM THE REPETITIVE BEEPING NOISE!
And before you ask: I had nothing to do with the breaking of this computer. Honestly.
Mac users are lonely people
“I walked into Starbucks and they. were. everywhere.”
“They who?”
“The macs. Everyone was on a mac.”
Snorts. “They all had Macs?”
“Every single one. Their little apples were glowing and everything.”
“No Windows? Anywhere?”
“Well there was one blue-glowing Dell in the far corner…”
“But how can that be?!”
“They’re lonely people, those Mac users.”
“I hope you don’t turn out lonely.”
“Thanks, dad. Thanks.”
History repeats itself
I cooked a fabulous vegetarian lasagna the other night. The family loved it and I was thrilled. Still giddy from the success of my latest experimental dish, I was idly cleaning the kitchen when my mother walks in and drops the scariest. comment. ever.
“You know, lasagna was always my signature dish.”
“Oh my god, DON’T SAY THAT.”
#1 most terrifying thing about getting older?
WHEN YOU REALIZE YOU’RE TURNING INTO YOUR MOTHER.
