Chanel attempts house cleaning, learns the difference between first and second degree burns
Funny story…
The other day, I was cleaning the house. (This was my first mistake, and within the next couple minutes you’ll see why—but if it becomes too tl;dr, know this: CLEANING IS HAZARDOUS TO YOUR HEALTH.)
I was mopping the floor, actually. With a steam mop. Did you know steam mops can get pretty hot, even after they’re off? I don’t recommend you try to touch a steam mop to see if that’s true though, unless you want to end up with something like THIS:
Oh but Chanel, you say. It doesn’t look that bad!
Well this is what it looked like ten hours later:
And it’s only downhill from there, my friends.
The initial burn didn’t hurt nearly as much as the aftershocks. It only started hurt less (or not at all) when it started blistering up—but by then, I had a whole new concern on my hands. Like, MY SKIN WAS BLOWING BUBBLES WITH ITSELF. Naturally, I turned to the only source I know for reliable medical information: Google.
Don’t you just love the generation we live in? Why on earth would you ever want to see a medical professional when you can just google it?
Reminds me of this exchange:
Miranda: I’ve been trying to self-diagnose myself on the internet.
Charlotte: You can do that?!
Miranda: Oh sure. You just type in your symptoms and wait for the word “cancer” to flash up on the screen.
So naturally, with an ever-enlarging blister on my hands (well, actually, my leg), I turned to google to find out what on earth was going on, and whether or not I could be expected to live. What I found out:
First degree burns are superficial. They affect only the epidermis, and cause reddening and a little swelling. The red area will turn white when you press on it. The skin over these burns peels off after a few days, and the burned area is mostly healed after a week or so. (Source)
Second degree burns are deeper, causing damage to the epidermis and partail damage to the dermis, including the blood vessels. They cause blisters, and are painful. The fluid inside a blister is called serum. It’s a watery liquid that leaks from nearby tissues and blood vessels that have been destroyed. This blister filled with serum provides pillow-like protection for the skin beneath it. Second degree burns take several weeks to heal completely. Eventually the fluid inside the blister is absorbed by the body,and the dead blister skin will drop away, leaving new skin underneath. (Source)
So basically, the destroyed tissue and blood vessels in my body are crying, and their tears merged together to fill a blister. Isn’t that poetic?! … And furthermore, their tears go on to protect the skin beneath it, and when that blister finally breathes its last breath and dies, it reveals from beneath its dead body a fresh new layer of skin!
ITS THE CIRCLE OF LIFE! Someone should write a screenplay about this.
More information about this self-sacrificing, heroic serum:
Serum is the liquid part of the blood, normally a golden yellow color, that is left when the blood cells are removed. It is comprised of water, as well as a very high content of various proteins. These include:
— albumin: a protein that aids in the proper retention of water in the bloodstream
— globulins: which are antibodies
— other useful proteinsSerum accumulates on burns, scrapes, or impetigo sores and as it dries, produces a characteristic honey-golden crust. (Source)
Is this not fascinating?!
Let me tell you something right now, Internet. If I had not tried to cleaned the house, I wouldn’t have gotten a 2nd degree burn on my leg—and if I hadn’t gotten that 2nd degree burn, I would have never been prompted to do a highly-educational google search on it—and if I hadn’t done that highly-educational google search, I wouldn’t have learned that the two inch bubble on my leg was filled with the tears of my organs and the remains of my blood! EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON!
… But that still doesn’t change the fact that I tried to clean the house and instead got a 2nd degree burn—so really, I think the moral of this story is to stay away from the cleaning the house, because you might just cause your organs to cry and start blowing bubbles with your skin.
So there you have it: unequivocal proof that cleaning the house is hazardous to your health.
(You’re welcome.)
Update, Monday June 1st: I bandaged the blister to protect it from exploding during dance practice, but tragically, the blister and its self-sacrificing serum met a tragic fate when my left leg slammed into it. I didn’t hear a splat, but suddenly the area felt sickeningly cool and I had the insatiable urge to yell, MY WATER BROKE. Rest in peace, blister. Your sacrifice and noble heroism for the next generation of new skin will always be remembered.
I once had a series of serum-filled blisters on my upper arm from an absolutely ridiculous sunburn (I was applying sunscreen every hour because I was that paranoid about getting burnt, and I still got roasted) so I had the pleasure of feeling a blister burst every day or so. Now I stay away from anything that can burn me! Haha.
I sure hope you don’t let this experience stop you from cleaning the house ever again. :P
Reply: Wow, you got 2nd degree burns from the sun?! Even after applying sunscreen?! That is RIDICULOUS. I don’t blame you for wanting to stay away from things that can burn you! … And don’t worry, I will bravely face house cleaning again. :D
June 3rd, 2009 at 3:55 pmOh no! That looks awful! I use a regular old fashioned mop, so hopefully I’m safe from this predicament.
Reply: You might think you are… but watch out for slipping!
June 4th, 2009 at 9:41 am(Everything in our houses can be out to kill us, if you try hard enough to make the connections, hahaha.)
wow that looks really bad. it’s gross and awful. i don’t want to know what it feels like. i’m so sorry.
June 4th, 2009 at 12:03 pmMy gawd D=
Wow that looks terrible! =| I can’t believe steam mops can be so dangerous!!!
Hope it gets better soon =(
June 4th, 2009 at 2:34 pm….Ouch.
As an aside, albumin is also the technical food sciencey way of referring to egg whites in the egg processing world. Just in case you were curious…
And apparently, I’ve been housecleaning under a rock or something; I had never heard of a steam mop before this.
June 4th, 2009 at 6:30 pmOh good God that was hilarious!
Ahem, sorry.
But now I shall forever know the difference between first and second degree burns.
What you ought to do is invest in an aloe plant. My boss taught me this, but apparently right after you get a burn, if you break off a leaf of aloe and rub the fluids that come out of it on the burn, it will prevent a blister and will immediately soothe the area.
I know I plan on buying one when I can find one in a local nursery.
But how well do these steam mops clean? Are they worth the trouble?
Reply: I’ve heard about the aloe thing! … Unfortunately, didn’t have any aloe on hand. :(
And steam mops work VERY well – I’ve used ours many time before without killing myself, so it’s not a super dangerous thing or anything … but they’re great for disinfecting and really cleaning your floors, and most can be used on title and sealed hardwood too!
June 5th, 2009 at 9:53 amOmigosh Chanel that is a nasty blister!!! I remember I burned my thumb while curling my hair once and had to go to a party where I walked around with my thumb in a cup of water because it was hella burning… and people though that’s how I hold my cup!! Ahahahahaha.
June 5th, 2009 at 2:47 pmHello. I just got scalded with hot water on my inner thigh. Second degree burns with open skin and blisters. I was afraid it was infected bc of the yellow crust; but your info re the proteins and antibodies really calmed my nerves. Did you keep your wound wrapped or not? I’ve heard both ways; my doctor says it needs oxygen to heal and I shouldn’t wrap it. Luckly I’m on vacation and can be bed ridden for a couple days but it’s rough. He also prescribed silverdene to put on the wound which is working well for now to prevent infection bug it’s only day 2. How long before your skin stopped “weeping” the clear fluid and began to dry up with new skin? Want to know when to start planning job interviews. Thanks.
June 19th, 2009 at 7:01 pm[...] Managing to use the steam mop again without endangering my health. [...]
July 19th, 2009 at 6:39 pm